The first thing I want you to know is that ‘NO’ is a complete sentence. No is a word we don’t use often enough. Have you ever said yes to so many things that you become overwhelmed, begin to regret saying yes to everyone and everything but then go ahead to still say yes? Aha! Welcome. Saying no is one of the most important life skills to learn.
You get a call from one of your numerous groups to host something, you say yes. A co-worker asks you to help with some of their task, you say yes. A family member asks you to help with another task, you say yes. Your congregation needs someone to do something, you say yes. All because you don’t want to get grief for saying no. Don’t kill yourself please. Learn to say “no” (even to yourself). Trying to be nice to everyone at the expense of yourself will only drain you.
Saying no doesn’t mean you’re a terrible person. It allows you have time to focus your time on things that are impactful and creating personal boundaries. Saying “no” is difficult for so many people because saying it brings feelings of guilt, you begin to feel like people will be disappointed or they will dislike you. When we even find the strength to say no, we follow up with so many reasons why we’re saying no. That’s why I want you to know that “no” is a complete sentence.
Just because you say “no” doesn’t mean you’re rude, unhelpful or unlikeable. Say no in a polite fashion, something like “I’m sorry I’m unable to help at this moment” will do. Sating yes to everything even when you’re overwhelmed will stress you, you’ll have a lot of tasks undone (or done haphazardly at best) or worst case, you’ll burnout.
Saying no allows you to say yes to what is important to you. It builds you cos when you say yes, it comes from a place of integrity and not from fear or an overwhelming need to be liked. Try it out this week.