Well well well!! Valentine’s day has come and gone right? Did you get any presents or I should mind my business? We were watching different social media platforms and all I can see is there the good – the bad – and the breakfast.
Hope you had fun though, so let us get to this weeks’ gist. We are going to be looking at the red flags in relationships. What do I mean by red flags? I mean all the negative traits, toxic traits, negative vibrations you get from your partner, that are not good or healthy for your love life.
The sad thing about the red flag is that many of us ignore these signs, and they eventually come back to haunt us and cause us heartbreaks, or as we call it in the streets – “Breakfast”.
So here is a summary of 5 signs that shows your spouse no longer loves or feels the relationship.
- LACK OF COMMUNICATION
This is basically the water to the cement that binds your relationship. Communication should always be open and two-way in a relationship. But when you notice your man/woman reduces their frequency of communicating with you, you need to start raising brows because if your partner is not talking to you, then who are they talking to? (Fink about it). Do not settle for someone that won’t talk to you at least twice a day, and feel comfortable. You deserve better!
- UNNECESSARY ARGUMENTS
So this point is birth from the lack of communication and miscommunication. All of a sudden you notice you and your partner are arguing over the silliest things like – the noise in the background during a call, a sarcastic joke, a WhatsApp status (WhatsApp status! really fam?), and so many other itty bitty reasons. When this starts, know that something is afoot and it is going to be a thorn in the flesh of your once happy relationship. So you either speak up about this or little arguments will become big arguments, and eventually become the iceberg to your Titanic.
- NO ACT OF KINDNESS
Now this point is very key because you should never date or be with someone that is not kind. I mean we were put on this earth to treat everyone with kindness, so why are you with someone that can’t show you kindness.
When I say kindness I mean someone that knows you in and out, understands your silence and gets you things you need. Now I am not saying you should be materialistic, but then everyone deserves gifts and presents every now and then. Plus there is an age-long myth that Nigerian girls do not know how to buy gifts for their partners. Let us change that narrative, you don’t need to break the bank (it is the thought that counts right?). When your partner doesn’t do these things, or they used to but suddenly stopped, then something is wrong and you need to check.
- ZERO EMPATHY
Empathy is the capacity to understand or feel what another person is experiencing from within their frame of reference, that is, the capacity to place oneself in another’s position. When your partner stops putting him/herself in your shoes, especially during arguments, then they are not interested in understanding you, which means they do not care how you feel. That in itself is a huge red flag in the relationship because when there is no understanding, there is no togetherness – you are heading to breakfast city – in a Lamborghini.
I mean this point is very obvious, but it is something a lot of you ignore. Like why is your partner keeping your relationship a secret? Are you a palliative?.
You hardly go out to events as a couple, you only meet in private places, your friends do not even know you, or they have never even uploaded your photo on their socials, then my brother/sister, you are in that relationship alone. There s nothing sweeter than being with your partner and they show you off in public, or online or wherever like “Look at my lover”. You could argue that what if you eventually break up? , how would you start explaining to the public and online in-laws?. Well, Love is meant to be total and complete, if you perish you perish!.
*Bonus Point: If your partner gets violent or is violent, please with full throttle and less hesitation, run away from that relationship. Do not be a victim of domestic violence all in the name of love, as it never ends well for the victim. Also, a vigil is meant to be held for those people that never take advice and always run back to their abuser after they have been K.Od.
Now those are the top 5 signs to look out for to know your partner is losing interest in the relationship. Love is easy, love is kind, love is beautiful when you are with the right person. Let us not make love look like it is extremely difficult.
Have a great week, and show love to your lover 24/7 hours a day, 365 days a week, and not just on Valentine’s day.